Chapter 7

　 Bruno’s words were always in my head those days. I was thinking about how to break off contact with Rex. I drove here and there around the city. Then I stopped in front of Rex’s apartment.
I was confused. I still didn’t know how to tell him that I wanted to break off contact with him. I stayed in my car and looked at my cell-phone. I didn’t know whether call him or not. After a while, I dialed his number.
“I’m downstairs from your apartment. I have something to say to you. Come down here. I’m waiting for you in my car.”
“I also have something to say. Wait a moment. I’ll be there soon.” He hung up.
When he came down, I got out of my car and went over to him.
“What do you want to say?” I asked.
“I’d like to hear what you have to say first,” he replied.
“OK. I just want to say one thing. Let’s end this. It’ better for us.”
“What do you mean?” he asked.
“Let’s break off ties. Don’t call me and don’t get in my way anymore.”
He was still. For a while, he looked at the ground, and I looked at him.
“What did you want to say?” I asked.
He raised his head. “I have nothing to say now. I wanted to ask you a question before, but I know the answer now.”
“Then I’ll go now.”
“Wait, Lawrence. I need a reason.”
“I told you before. We can’t be friends.”
“But you didn’t tell me why. I won’t listen to you if you can’t give me an appropriate reason.”
“There is no good for in us continuing contact. In other words, you are a weight in my life.”
“You have another choice. If you quit your job, it is no problem for us to be friends. You’re doing dangerous work. You can quit, why don’t you?”
“It’s not a good choice. I won’t change my mind. I have to go.”
“Why won’t you listen to me for once?” He stopped me.
“Things are not easy like you think,” I replied. I couldn’t tell him the truth. Until Bruno arrested Ivan I had to wait.
“Just for now, please listen to my advice,” he said.
“Don’t keep after me like that!” Sometimes I thought he was annoying. Why didn’t he just do what I said?
“You force me to be like this. Since you saved me at that villa that day, my mind is full of you. I miss you every day. And since I saved you in that alley, I was also worried about you. I am afraid that you will get hurt again. Tell me, what should I do?” He was close to tears.
“Forget me and everything about me. Our relationship must end tonight. ”
“No, I can’t.” He looked at me and shook his head.
“You must,” I said coldly and turned to go.
Before I got in my car, he embraced me from behind. “Please don’t leave me.”
I didn’t know what his face looked like at that moment, because my back was to him. But I could feel that he embraced me tightly. I knew he didn’t want me to go. However, I had to go.
“Don’t act like a child.” I pulled away. As Bruno said, I had to end our connection. I left him there and went away.
I didn’t go straight home. I drove my car with no destination. At last I went to the top of the mountain to see the night view. Suddenly, the rain came down. I got in my car and listened to the patter of the raindrops. The pouring rain was fitting to my sad feelings.
I thought that I had said everything to him and we would not meet again. However, I was wrong. He was one hundred times more persistent than I thought.
The next evening, my phone was ringing on the table. It rang for a long time, but I didn’t listen. Fifteen minutes later, it stopped.
I picked up it and looked at the screen. There were more than one hundred missed calls, all from Rex. I knew it would be like that. He was really like a woman. I never knew a man who would be so persistent as to make one hundred calls.
I put away my cell-phone and walked to the window. When I looked out of it, I was shocked. I saw Rex downstairs. What was he doing? Didn’t he know he was doing a dangerous thing? I went downstairs right away.
He stood in front of his car. And he looked very calm, like he was sure that I would come.
I went over to him and asked, “What are you doing here now?”
“Why don’t you answer my calls?” he didn’t answer me but asked a question.
“I told you, not call me again. Did you forget?”
“But I’d like to ask you a question, the last one,” he replied.
“Did anybody tell you before that you’re very annoying?” I said.
“It will be the last time. Think carefully and give me your answer,” he said and stopped a few seconds. “Do you love me?” he asked.
It was a difficult question. How could I answer? I wanted to know the answer too. His face was always in my mind. I was worried about him and missed him almost every day. Because of him I even argued with Bruno. When I looked at his sad face, I felt sad too. Was it love? If it was love, my love was a forbidden fruit.
“Go back. I said everything last time. Don’t waste time on me,” I said in a cold voice.
He smiled when he heard my words, but his face looked so sad. “I love you, Lawrence. You are inside here,” he said and pointed at his heart. “How can I forget you? If I can’t see you again, my heart will be broken. And I will be too sad to breathe,” he said, his eyes full of sadness.
“That’s your problem, not mine.” I turned to go. My words might hurt him, but I had no choice.
“Wait, Lawrence.” He stopped me and put a knife in my hand.
I looked at him in surprise. What did he want to do? He was capable of stupid things, I thought.
“If you don’t love me, if you want me to forget you, use this knife to stop my heart before you leave. Then I won’t be sad anymore, I won’t get in your way again, and I will be able to forget you.” His tears ran down.
“I don’t have time to play this stupid game with you. Get away and don’t come here again.” I left and went into my apartment as fast as I could. I didn’t want to stay there a second more. I was afraid that if I listened to him any more, I would change my mind.
I dialed Mr. Thomas’s number. “Please come get your son. I will be thankful for it.” I hung up.
The clock on the wall was going on. I was restless. One second was an hour for me. I was afraid of going near to the window and looking out of it. I didn’t know what I would do if he was still there. I sat on the sofa and looked at the clock. Thirty minutes went past. I stood up and went near to the window. I was relieved when I saw nobody downstairs.
I just wanted him to leave then. However, I forgot that love is supreme. It always makes people brave and crazy. Sometimes it is good, but sometimes it isn’t.


— TBC